Ariana Newcomer

Healing the soul's voice

How I got my name…

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My name, Ariana, is a spiritual name I took in my 30s. When I interviewed Riane Eisler recently for my Reclaiming The Wise Woman Elder – for the healing of Earth summit, I told her the story.

I told her because SHE was really responsible for me taking the name.

Her book, The Chalice and The Blade, was a transformational book for me. Reading about ancient European cultures that had worshipped the Great Goddess, in which women held power in equalitarian societies, and war was almost non-existent, was a revelation.

Learning her language of the Dominator paradigm vs. the Partnership paradigm was liberating and affirming.

We are not doomed by human nature to use violence! Cultures existed in our past where women and men were in partnership with each other and with our Earth! We can do it again, and even better.Continue Reading

There’s a silver lining to Trump…

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Donald Trump’s bragging about assaulting women brought up a lot of buried memories for me, and clearly, for LOTS of women. It’s AWFUL.

AND – it has a silver lining. Please watch this short video to hear what it is, and let me know your thoughts.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject both men and women. Join the conversation on Facebook. It’s wonderful to see conscious men speak out on this subject.

PS – Don’t forget about The Divine Biz Giveaway – with hundreds of products worth thousands and thousands of dollars that you can get for fr*ee!

Go see what interests you and get your fr*ee gifts now!

It’s designed as a win-win. You get stuff you can use, and we get to build our email lists, and connect with people who can use our services.

Of course, you can unsubscribe at any time from a list that doesn’t serve you. Check out the site, and see what you resonate with.

Maybe you’ll get the perfect thing you need right now.

Blessings –
Ariana

Don’t Yell At Me!

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I remember last Thanksgiving at our family gathering. I got passionate about something, and a male family member kept interrupting me. I told him very firmly to stop, and he said, “Don’t yell at me.”

Now, if you’d ever heard me yell (remember, I used to be an opera singer), you’d know I wasn’t even close to yelling. I told him so, and he left the table.

He wanted to control the conversation, and when I wouldn’t let him, he accused me of yelling, and that was supposed to make me shut up. When that didn’t work, he took his football and left.

Most of you women have heard this MANY, MANY times in your lives when you weren’t even close to yelling. Some of you men may have been the ones saying, “Don’t yell at me,” when the woman wasn’t even close to yelling.Continue Reading

Great advice from the Water Board???

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I just read some of the best advice I’ve seen recently about how to communicate – from a place I would NEVER have expected.. the chair of the CA State Water Resources Control Board!

Felicia Marcus happens to be a Harvard classmate of mine, though I never met her there. She and the Board have the incredibly difficult job of creating new water plans for our drought-stricken state with stake holders whose interests often seem to be diametrically opposed.

Herding cats. On steroids. Lions and tigers and…

Yet, they’ve managed to get some great stuff done. Her attitude towards communication has A LOT to do with it.Continue Reading

Are You In Partnership With Yourself?

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Are You In Partnership With Yourself?I’m passionate about creating true partnership between men and women, so we can all be in partnership with our planet to create a world we can all thrive in.

So, I’m taking a course based on Riane Eisler’s book, “The Power of Partnership.” I’ve been blessed to work with her directly in the past, and she is an amazing woman who has been inspiring me since the 80s.

Our first module is about our partnership with SELF – which is the place we have to start. We can’t create true partnership with others until we become a true partner with ourSELF.

For me, this means accepting ALL of me – even the parts that seem pretty dark or that look like they’re still sabotaging me in spite of all my years of personal growth work.

One issue that’s coming up again is the masculine vs. feminine within myself, and in our culture. I’ve found a more integrated way of looking at them in Riane’s work.

There are a lot of authors and coaches now working with “feminine principles,” “feminine power,” “feminine leadership models,” and “feminine” _______ (fill in the blank with your favorite). They encourage women to tune in to their “feminine” instead of their  “masculine,” which has been causing them to push too hard, to burn out, to operate from a way of being that isn’t natural.

Let me be clear – I’m FOR the resurgence of the feminine. We need to bring the traditionally-considered-as-female qualities — caring, nurturing, collaboration, deep listening, going with the flow, doing without forcing, etc. — into businesses, our lives, and our culture. We also need to raise women up to true equal (partnership) status with men.Continue Reading

No, no, no!!

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no

Do you struggle sometimes to say that little word, “no?”

Yep. Me, too.

I led exercises in how to say NO at the FEM Talks event, “How To Set Nourishing Boundaries and Say No With An Open Heart”.

I asked the women when it was hard for them to say no. Some of the things they said were:Continue Reading