Ariana Newcomer

Healing the soul's voice

Perspective is Everything

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Perhaps the most important lesson I’ve learned in my personal growth journey (and my transformational business journey) is that perspective is everything.

There’s what happens to me, and there’s my perspective (my story) about what happens, and the two are not the same. I don’t always get to choose what happens, but I get to choose my perspective.

I’ve had to learn this profound lesson over and over. When I forget to check in about my perspective, I can get into some deep doo-doo. When I remember to ask, “Is this perspective useful to me or not,” I have the option to choose. If the perspective is not useful (would make things worse, keep things stuck, or make me or someone else miserable), I’ve learned to shift my story about what happened.Continue Reading

Your Voice In The World

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We’ve just recently celebrated one of our country’s most extraordinary leaders, Martin Luther King, Jr. I’m proud to say that my Dad was on the famous march with MLK from Selma to Montgomery. He and several others went from our town in Connecticut to be part of one of the seminal events of their time.

My Dad was a minister and a charismatic, compelling speaker. My Mom worked for change by supporting my Dad, and by also being a passionate voice for change with us kids, her students, friends and her communities.

One of my parents’ gifts to me was this legacy of passionate engagement, of speaking up and speaking out for change. It’s natural to me to be a voice for change. That’s what I grew up with. When I got older, I was involved in protests against the Vietnam war.

I’m now speaking out for change in the way we run our world. I speak for true partnership between men and women, rather than domination of one over the other (traditionally male over female). I speak out for change in our economy so we can have a planet we can continue to live on.Continue Reading

Business As a Transformational Journey

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Being in business for yourself is not for the faint of heart. Those people who try to sell you the “easy way” to 6 or 7 figures are just flat out dishonest.

Of course, we are really attracted by that language. We all want, wish, hope, that it’s going to be easy and fun. As human beings, we love magical thinking! The truth is, it takes guts, persistence, courage, and a large dose of ongoing personal growth to make it as an entrepreneur, especially if you’re creating a transformational business. And, ultimately, that’s good news. (And some if it IS easy and fun.)

You try things. Some work, and some just fail. Most don’t work the way you planned. You have days of delight, excitement, feeling on purpose, feeling on fire. You have days when you don’t want to get out of bed.

On the road to success lie a lot of potholes. Some of them are large enough to drive a truck into. I know because I’ve been in them.Continue Reading

3 Ways To Give Yourself A Raise By Empowering Your Boundaries

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Are you always thinking about how to help & support your clients? Of course! But are you helping or hurting? If you have trouble setting boundaries and sticking to them, you’re hurting your clients and yourself.

We can be afraid that setting boundaries will cut off opportunities, or make us the bad guy. Having clear boundaries and making sure you are taking care of yourself actually make you a better coach.

Here are 3 ways you can empower your boundaries and give yourself a raise by stopping your habit of giving away your time.Continue Reading

Gender Bias In Business: Speaking out can backfire!

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I usually talk about how important it is for us to speak up and speak out for ourselves (especially women) and for change. We usually don’t speak up enough in many areas of our lives. Of course, speaking up at the appropriate time is critical, and HOW we say things is even more essential.

I just learned something new about how to speak about gender bias. It’s an issue I address with my clients – always – because it is so often operating unconsciously for all of us, men and women alike. It affects how we listen to each other, how we speak, how we behave toward each other, and how successful we are.

I talk about creating a paradigm shift in our culture into true partnership between men and women, about speaking up and speaking out for ourselves and for partnership, about claiming our place beside men (no longer slightly below them). I support my clients in creating highly successful, deeply fulfilling businesses as women entrepreneurs and change agents – as part of this new paradigm. Being able to speak with power and confidence is crucial to your success. Shifting the gender bias is a central part of creating the new economy.

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Menopause, Shmenopause

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Let’s face it, the word “menopause” is entirely inadequate as a name for this time in women’s lives when we are shifting from our reproductive years to another phase of life. The word “menopause” simply means the cessation (or pause) of menses (our period). In our times, menopause is mostly treated as a medical problem and a “loss of youth” problem in our youth worshipping culture.

Let’s acknowledge the complexity of menopause, and how different it can be for different women. I’ve been lucky that the physical aspects of the process have been very easy for me so far. (Thanks, Mom!) I have friends for whom it’s been tough. I don’t wish to belittle or Continue Reading